I was in my early teens when I really started worrying about what I looked like. Thinking I would only be beautiful if I was skinny and toned. I think this is what either triggered or highly impacted my depression and anxiety through my teenaged years.
It’s a mentality I have struggled with even through my late 20’s.
I was 29 when I finally decided that being skinny didn’t matter to me anymore, ironically on my birthday. I was sitting at my kitchen table (as I am now) writing an email to a client about how beautiful she already was. She may have been a little over weight, but she was BEAUTIFUL. It didn’t change how anyone thought of her, we all thought she was beautiful just the same.
It stopped me in my tracks.
If I could love another person, who I had technically never met, with no limitations; why could I not do that for myself?! Why could I not see every scar, stretchmark and roll as a badge and sign I had LIVED?
I decided right then and there that it was time to start the practice of loving myself whole heartedly.
I started changing the way my inner dialogue went, I changed ‘I hate this’ to “I love this’. I started eating better and exercising not to be ‘skinny’ but to be a healthier version of myself. I stopped fasting or skipping meals in hope of losing faster (news flash, it works the OPPOSITE way!!) I started to eat less and less junk.
It started working.
Not only did it have a HUGE impact on my depression and anxiety, I was feeling healthy for the first time in my life. I felt strong, empowered and full of love. I had been a self love, fitness, nutrition and empowerment coach for over a year and I was only JUST starting to really understand what it was about for MYSELF.
Its been three months of truly practicing what I preach and expanding my capacity to love. The life change is amazing, I wish I could put it into words. Changing my perspective has truly changed how I look at everything in life, from my incredible clients to friends and family, right up to myself.
Today I can sit here and say that, though I have my struggles, I do love my body. It isn’t always easy, and I still slip up (only been 3 months) but this journey is one I won’t ever stop. I invite you to love yourself too, body, mind, spirit, all of you. Because you know what? You are the most beautiful person in your life, you NEED to see that just like the world around you does.
When I started health and fitness coaching with Beachbody I got a lot of ‘you’re just shaming others into hating themselves’ and ‘you just look for ‘fat’ people!’ For me that’s NEVER been what its about, it may have taken me a long time to learn to love myself, but I have always loved every body shape there is out there. Always.
So why do I do this gig then? Body positivity my friends. EVERYONE deserves to feel their best and look the way THEY want to look. I simply provide the tools and kick ass motivation/empowerment to help reach the goal that they would like help with. Skinny isn’t always healthy (I am proof of that) and being more on the curvy side doesn’t always mean unhealthy (also proof of that). It is a FEELING and a way of life to be healthy. Your size does not determine this!! I don’t care if you’re 110lbs or 300lbs YOU ARE BEAUTIFUL.
End of story and slight soapbox rant 😉